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Well I have not responded well at all, I got 2 on the left, both 8mm and 4 on the right, again only 8mm, at this point they should have been at least 13mm and there should have been at least 8 in total, so it's been cancelled. the consultant was great, he was so apologetic as if it was his fault my body f*cked up.
I really can't believe that this has happened and I have no idea what else we can try, I'm so scared that this could be the end of our journey
I'm back from my appointment and all is well.
I start injections tonight - 250mg Puregon (FSH) for the next 6 nights, then in for another scan next Tuesday and depending on what the scan shows i.e. how many follies I have, will depend on what happens next - if there are insufficient follies then IVF will be cancelled, so I'm keeping everything crossed that we get a minimum of 8 - the more the better though
We're finally going to be starting IVF - it's scary and exciting at the same time, it's hard to believe that we're actually going to be doing IVF in a couple of weeks after all these years of waiting and wanting
The 2ww is a killer! Not helped by the fact that the clinic never bothered to call me half way through as they said they would so that I could ask any questions that I may have about the way I was feeling.
I had a few days of cramping on and off after the IUI, but once I got to 7DPO I have had cramping every day.
I am now 10DPO and I've started to feel tired during the day (ended up in bed by 9pm a couple of times) and constantly yawning, a feeling of being bloated and as if AF is about to arrive as well.
My boobs are just starting to hurt, but my nipples have been sore for a couple of days now.
I buckled and tested and to no great surprise both came back -ive.
I got my paperwork through from the clinic 
, I have to go in for a baseline scan on 12 October - 3 days after I get back off holiday 
, then further scans on 23rd, 30 and 2nd with expected IVF starting week commencing 5th November 
I've been matched and accepted When they first phoned me this morning they wanted me to start 15th September - until I pointed out again that I was on holiday from 17th September, now I am to start in October 
- not the pre-holiday cycle that I was hoping for , but at least I know we are on our way. They are going to do my protocol and put it in the post, so all being well I will get it over the next few days. 
I'm thrilled that I now know where we stand, but at the same time I'm disappointed that we won't be doing anything before we go away.
The up side is that I will be able to really let my hair down on holiday and know that I won't be suffering from 
at all, and be able to stay awake in the evenings rather than feeling like I've just ran to the States without a break (IYKWIM) and enjoy everything without having to worry if it's OK to eat, drink or do something whilst being pg
Roll on October 
OK so some people believe it and some don't, well I do, and I have asked someone who was recommended to me, and her predictions seem pretty accurate from what I have seen so far. Well this is what she had to say on my future and parenthood:
"I see BOY and SEPT so this is either
I see your son as someone who is very cheerful, someone who has a good heart and often wears it on his sleeve. He is kind and gentle and someone who easily able to show his affection through hugging or cuddling with you when he is younger.He is going to love movies, and will have a few special characters that he easily recognizes and calls out by name. (loves the shows that people are dressed up) and anything to do that includes music as he loves to bop around and dance.
He is someone who is fun to be around, he is always relaxed and really fun. He likes to have a good time, enjoys the variety in life and seems to get along really easily with the people he meets. I think that at times he can be a bit on the shy side, when meeting new people he listens to them talk and gets to know them before answering some more personal questions about himself. I think that you will find that he is very protective of his younger brother (they are just over 2 years apart) and always makes sure that he is well looked after. I think that you might find that he even at times takes the blame for things his brother has done just to keep him out of trouble.He is gentle and kind, someone who does not talk badly of anyone and usually keeps his negative opinions to himself. Someone who is easily able to verbalize his disappointments or frustrations and will easily ask for your guidance trying to solve them. He is not someone to leave something unfinished, he is always trying to make sure that everything is completed and no loose ends in sight. He likes to be able to walk away from a project knowing that although it might not have gone according to plan, but he did his best, and it is done right.When it comes to career paths, I see him involved with the notary public. Often helping with will arrangements and estate planning and other legal documentation. He is very highly organised and someone who does the job till its done and tries to be thorough.When it comes to marriage I see him closer to 26, he will have GIRL BOY GIRL.
I called the clinic today and I have been offered to another couple as the first couple did not respond.
The nurse said that she asks all couples to let her know when they are going on holiday so that this situation is avoided, but I guess they didn't listen or weren't that interested in being matched.
All being well we will hear by the end of this week that we have been accepted (assuming they're not on holiday as well), but the nurse said she was certain that I would be accepted this time 
the clinic are going to wait another week before they offer me to anyone else as the couple still haven't responded, that will make it 3 weeks they've had to make up their minds - I sure hope that them being on holiday is the reason for the delay
with a 2yr waiting list I thought this part would be the simplest - typical for me that it's as frustrating as the previous chapters 
found me this morning, so I'll be contacting the clinic to speak to the woman who put me on the pill to discuss what to do, I'm still going to be pushing for an August IVF, if I don't push for IVF in August, it's a month wasted that I can ill afford, waiting until I get back from the States, only gives me 2 attempts at the most assuming they won't do IVF back to back which really isn't that much at least it'll give me 3 attempts by doing it in August as well, hopefully I won't need all 3 attempts though After asking the recipient matcher the nurse came back to me to say that I'm to start taking the pill on CD3 though they still didn't bother to explain where they were in terms of matching etc, they seemed to just want me off the phone
is due, and she said that we wouldn't be going ahead that early anyway - it would be September - to which I had to point out that I was away then, so it'll more likely by October when we return now 
too long to wait and too close to not actually giving us any time to achieve a 
Unless I can manipulate my cycle somehow to allow us to have an IVF cycle just before we go away
so no reason to stall, and managed to figure out how to fax it from my PC , the receptionist said that she has passed it on to the Consultant and he will pass it to the other Karen for matching to an egg recipient, so hopefully we can get started real soon - I stated on the fax that I had already started on the pill so that shouldnt hold us up and that I was on CD22 so they have all my cycle details Just had another call from the clinic - I will hear about being matched to an egg recipient by the end of the week
Just been on to the Dr's and suprise suprise still nothing - I swear to god they couldn't get their act together if their life depended on it
That means I will have to wait until next week before I can chace them up with us going away as I doubt very much that they will have anything for me tomorrow 
And so the cycle begins again
I'm really starting to think that having a go at IVF in August is a no starter for us with all the delays we're having - it should have been a no brainer 
that it all goes well and works first time for us
Well 
arrived this morning 
so Wednesday I will be starting the pill
Apparently my CMV is still + ive so I have to wait 6 weeks before I can have it re-tested and only when it comes back as - ive can go ahead 
So no + pg before we go away 
Looks like it'll be October at the very earliest before we can have our first, and probably only IVF attempt the way things are going
Think I'm going to disappear for a while as I am totally 
and 
right now and I'm starting to think that it really isn't going to happen for me after all
booked another appointment with a Dr in my surgery to discuss the way forward for getting rid of this +ive CMV result, as I really can't be waiting for 6 weeks in the hope that it will clear itself
221 days until I am classed as too old for TTC through egg-share and my only chance of ever conceiving a child is gone forever
